Baby

It was springtime. Your dad was busy planting flowers around the house, setting the scene for a beautiful porch during cooler summer afternoons. At the same time setting in an automatic irrigation system as neither I, your dad to be, nor your mum, are ever up to regular chores, gardening included.

Your mum told me she was 4 days late. Then it was 5 days. We agreed that come Monday, she should check with her physician. It was Saturday, I was face and knee high in mud,  You will God willing grow up and realize that your Papa isn't exactly the most handy person in the world (but the most stubborn, he is!!), and that stupid irrigation system looked more innocent than it turned out to be.
Ah well, your mum sat on the balcony and asked me if she might be pregnant. She told me to pass by the pharmacy and get a pregnancy test. You see, that was something we planned for later ... my heart lept, it cannot be true.  I tried to keep a straight face, but the truth of the matter is, suddenly I felt the urge to redo the entire irrigation system, dig new flower beds and run up and down the street. 

That evening, I got the pregnancy test and dashed to your uncle's house. He had a little gathering and your mum and I thought we pass by before we head to dinner out with friends. I had the test in my pocket and slipped it into your mum's hand. I couldn't wait. Your mum was aghast, saying "Akid la" - meaning certainly not here or now. Later that evening, you mum came nodding "Nop!". Yikes! I felt dizzy. I kept a straight indifferent face and we went out to that dinner. You see baby, your dad hates anticipation, because time and time again he gets disappointed when things do not turn as expected. Another thing baby, eventually things turn much better, but not the first time.

During dinner, a nosy friend of your mum's was bugging her over drinking - saying "Oh if you didn't drink wine, I would have been sure you were hiding a little baby in your belly ". I felt a stab of pain. She spoke of her sons and I felt so jealous.

Two days later, your Aunt (whom you will spend a lot or time with when you grow up), told your mum that she might have not correctly used the urine test. I urged your mum to have a blood test. The anticipation grew. The lab said they will fax the results at 4.30 pm. Your dad couldn’t take the excitement. Baby, my heart was beating at a new rhythm. Baby, something inside felt different.. Yet I couldn't stay put, so dealing like I always do with every major life event,  I went to sleep.

At 4.30, an ambiguous fax with medical results arrives.  I googled the numbers, your mum called your Aunt Nour. Yes, it was positive. We were pregnant, and you baby were the size of a raisin on your mum's tummy. As with every exciting news, I got diarrhea coupled with a strange urge to start scrubbing the floor. Sweety you will realize as you go nappy free someday that those two activities do not go in synch. Disbelief sunk in. 

The First Few Weeks 

Doctor appointments on Fridays at 1 p.m became my favorite time of the year. I couldn't wait to see you for the first echo-graphic screen. The doctor showed us the heart beat.. a small blotch ...114 was the number of your heart beats per minute. My heart missed a beet!! 

 

Baby! Nature works in miraculous ways. You are developing inside your mum’s belly – just the thought of this miracle makes me shiver. You are precious because life is a miracle to start with. You are precious also because you are a continuation of us.. not us as your mum and dad per se, but us as all the loved ones who also at one point helped bring us too, your parents into this world. I will tell you more about your mum and dad, you grandmas and grandpas – you will learn to love as they loved you unconditionally from the first moment.

Baby, the first few weeks after we knew you were coming were enervating. Everyone tells you the first baby is a handful, but you will never know it until you are in it. Your mum got onto strict diet, moving carefully about, limiting movement, sleeping and taking care of herself because you were attached to her body. You have to remember this when you tells you she knows what’s best for you!! As for me, your dad, I developed this paradoxical new self. I suddenly started tolerating noisy babies, driving carefully and defensively, not to mention adapt to heightened sense of smell and hearing to an unbelievable extent. This is the instinctive defense mechanism of our cave dwelling ancestors to protect their offspring, kicking in the 21^st century.

Back

I think I will resume blogging..So much needs to be said.

... they will rise

It was a dream, a song, a wish, a sigh... of an event that was not likely to occur. Yet, it did happen. People did rise.

Politics aside, and a bit of harmless chauvinism in, Lebanon was the first to send both halves of its population into the street. Flag waving, street camping, cross-social opposition first featured in 2005 in this part of the world. Lebanese protesters camped some 555 days facing the Governmental House in Downtown Beirut. The act of circumventing demonstrators through "safe passages" was perfected over here.

I was very politicized back then .. I strongly sided with one "Movement" , but I couldn't be prouder to see that even the "opposing party" at the time could gather tens of thousands or hundreds of thousands or a million .. who's counting in a civilized manner and who also waved the same flag, sang the same anthem, and too (the people maybe not the leaders) wanted a healthy progressive country. It was merely a difference in perspective.

It did end in a violent way. Street fights broke out a number of times in Beirut since 2008. What didn't change are the old faces. Some changed sides, some became more radical, and some were forgotten.. but the old ways still rule. The Lebanon the demonstrators called for was not exactly a Lebanon the so called rulers, leaders and cheer leaders have in mind.

In many Arab countries, popular revolt was taken for a joke.. a dangerous joke... yet it is happening. My fear is that when politicians take over.. they tarnish the sincerity of the people.. A few moments were historic, a few years were anti-climatic!

Still, there is nothing more beautiful that people taking control of their country's streets and squares. Will democracy and people's genuine rule suddenly overtake Arab countries. Well, it's a matter of time.... a long time till it actually happens. At the time being, one dream has come true.. The Arab people have broken the wall of silence and fear in Tunis, Egypt, and very soon elsewhere: Good start! A word of warning - Ahead are turbulent years.. Today we celebrate the sunrise.. the shining rays that shatter the darkness of the night. It is usually very hot in desert countries during daytime.. too bright for comfort.. too hot for survival .. The sun will indeed by burning for a long time before the peoples who summoned in freedom learn how to adapt.

A dream came true .. a sigh was answered.. Today, we celebrate. Tomorrow new dreams have to be crafted behind the doors, in the minds of those who will rise again one day ... History is a funny being..

Good Morning Beirut!

قومي يا أحلى لؤلؤة أهداها البحر، قومي لكي يبقى العالم يا بيروت
Rise, O Most Beautiful Pearl of the Sea, Rise for the World to remain O Beirut!

A Promise is a Promise

Originally posted at thejewsoflebanon.org on December 21, 2007 @ 2:35 am ·
Filed under Projects

Introduction by Site Administrator: On November 25, pictures were posted of a Jewish cemetery in the historic port city of Sidon, located in southern Lebanon. We receive hundreds of daily visitors to the site, but it was not a coincidence that Isaac Levy, a Lebanese living abroad, would see the tomb of his father for the first time in 22 years… on the screen of a computer monitor.

We launched this project not through calculation but through conviction, a dialogue over the blog was carried out, and the innocent wishes of Isaac were realized- Fadi (original photographer) once again visited the site and placed flowers on Isaac’s father’s tomb, reciting a prayer, and once again exemplifying the Lebanon we believe in; Lebanon the message of religious tolerance and coexistence. Was it that both of these men shared stories of their fathers, whose bodies are buried in the bosom of the earth in distant lands that brought them together? This bittersweet and emotional story was carried out between two men who never even met each other, who know no more than the first name and email address of the other, to an audience of like-minded people from across the globe who abide to an overriding loyalty to mankind as a whole.
The original pictures and the corresponding dialogue where this was discovered: Please Click Here

Now, we present to you the new photographs where Isaac’s father was honored, where Fadi showcases the beauty which is the essence of man. Fadi’s accompanying letter to Isaac and the world:

A promise is a promise. It’s a joyous season, the holidays of the 3 monotheistic religions of our country fall in a 21 day period. Hanukkah, Adha, and Christmas. On the second day of Eid, I packed the camera, and paid a second visit to the very windy and wet Cemetery to recite the Fatiha for Isaac’s dad – in lieu of my own father.

I made it, no climbing this time. The stormy weather was the perfect chance to get closer to the collapsing western side of the cemetery. Better still, I could drive the car right to the front entrance of the cemetery this time.

The tombs of Isaac’s family are not difficult to spot, but the name engravings are not there. I recited three Fatihas, took the photos, and felt a warm sense of satisfaction. Perhaps far away, in the western coast of Africa, my dad would rest in peace, and just maybe, someone would pass by one day and recite a prayer so he may rest in peace.

Peace, such a word we miss. Internal peace, such an emotion we lack. We have so much in common, the same air we breathe, the same soil the holds us together eventually. Good and love are indivisible, and there is plenty of them to keep everyone content. Why can’t we realize that? One day I came over a very interesting verse from the Quran – a very “non-denominational” verse! A verse that gave me, least of all, the answer I sought.

Say We believe in God and that which is revealed unto us and that which was revealed unto Abraham, and Ishmael, and Isaac, and Jacob, and the tribes, and that which Moses and Jesus received, and that which the prophets received from their Lord. We make no distinction between any of them, and unto Him we have surrendered. [Quran - 002.136]

If it is religion that separates us, then it is the wrong religion. If it is politics that bring us apart, then it is the wrong politics. If it is anything else, let us reach out and hold each other closer.
In this small beautiful mad country that we call home, we have 18 different denominations; the last and only country in this region to maintain plurality, but at a very hefty price. In this season of celebration of the many faiths, we should be keen to first, realize that we have so much in common, faith wise, country wise, life wise. We have so much to lose if we are off-guard for one second. In this season of holiness, we should realize that Forgiveness is the true path to inner peace. In this season of holiness, when the whole world is turning mad with feuds, with hatred, with wars, with walls and landmines, with religious (sic) segregations, separatism, we are truly blessed, but most of us do not realize it. Some of us who already do have a huge mission.
On the drive back home, I realized that Gibran Tueini (Slain Lebanese journalist, his original oath, click here) in his oath missed an integral part of our society, a wandering lost part of Lebanon - Lebanese Jews! So I took the liberty to rephrase it:

We pledge by God, Muslims, Christians and Jews, to stay united, forever and ever, to defend our great Lebanon, Long Live You! Long live Lebanon!

A belated Happy Hanukkah, Happy Adha, Happy Christmas!

It is a pledge a few of us, soon to grow in number, to preserve our plurality, and to be the defenders of our brothers’ and sisters’ memories and places until their return.

Sidon’s Jewish Cemetary

Sidon's Jewish Cemetary

Originally posted on thejewsoflebanon.org on November 25, 2007 @ 9:26 pm ·

Filed under Projects

A few kilometers south of An-Nijmeh Square/Place d'étoile , Downtown Sidon, lies the Jewish cemetery, on a small hill supposedly overlooking the ever blue Mediterranean. On the western side, the cemetery is in very bad shape, the hill is sinking, and some of the graves have actually tilted.
Unfortunately, the cemetery is right next to the biggest dump in south Lebanon. A 100-feet high mountain of garbage on the southern coast of Sidon - by all means an environmental catastrophe. The Sidon Municipality has had enough pressure and scandals from the media I presume, so they have guards there preventing anyone from taking photos. They stopped me from taking the photos of the tilting side of the cemetery, or from entering it from that side. I tried to explain I was after the cemetery and had no interest in the dump, to no avail.

Eventually, I had to sneak from the other side of the cemetery, and climb the dusty hill, in broad daylight, which seems the best time to sneak anywhere without raising suspicion! There is no "entrance" per se for the cemetery. I recall there used to be a sign with Hebrew letters marking the cemetery, but that was removed. I think this is some sort of "hiding" the place to protect it from vandals.

Many of the inscriptions that only have Hebrew letters are broken, but those that have Arabic writing and Hebrew letters are left intact! I believe that there is more than a coincidence to this. I got to know that last year the place was cleaned by the municipality, the weeds, trees, etc, seem reasonably within control for a deserted graveyard.

I will try to go in without a very obvious camera next time, or use my cell-phone camera. I am not sure what can be done to preserve that cemetery, but my heart broke to think that these were someone's parents or grandparents, lying there; they died in their country, certain that they will rest in peace forever in their homeland. Look what happened! Nobody, dead or alive, should be desecrated or forgotten in their own country.

I was not sure what to say when I walked there, so I prayed in Arabic, a verse from the Qu'ran that the angels repeat to the souls in Heaven: Salamon Kawlin min Rabb Rahim – "Peace! A word from the Merciful God". Our God, their God, everyone's God. Peace!

A Dusty Comeback

A Dusty Comeback

Yes, it’s true I have not been blogging for over a year, but that doesn’t mean I’ve been kept quiet at all. Blogging in times of war is easy, and since everyone seems to be foretelling another war between “Israel” – (so called), and Hezbollah (henceforth HA) – I thought I might as well get a head start, and a include a brief update of what I have been doing from time to time.

Well, one day the dialogue with Ephraim will become a book, to explain how two minds on opposite sides of the border, and who call each other enemies, thought and attempted a dialogue. Needless to say, it failed, and I don’t have his email, otherwise we could have been email pals exchanging historic facts when we were not “enemies.” No hurry there, when it’s time to fight, HA will get to it, but until then, there is no reason why I cannot behave like a civilized non-violent person.

On the other hand, as if God was testing my, I stumbled upon an article in a Lebanese Daily on a certain website by Lebanese Jews. Turns out the website was constructed by “Aaron” – aka Haron- a Lebanese Muslim Expat from southern Lebanon - about Lebanese Jews. Religious affiliation is not the intention here, it is the concept I’m trying to relay, got it? I became a fan of the site. http://www.thejewsoflebanon.org/

I live in the southern Lebanese city of Sidon – and I decided I should do my part in relaying and documenting the heritage of the Jewish Lebanese compatriots, and exercise to myself more than anyone else that religion – or lack of it , ethnicity, is not what brings me and “Ephraim” apart, it is political conviction: He is a Zionist, I am not, he is racist, I am not, he is bloodthirsty and a war monger, and I am not. So, until he resolves his differences, I decided I should celeberate mine! I should make peace with yet another part of my Lebanese Identity, the wandering Jewish community that had to leave Lebanon during the 1975-1990 war. The house with many mansions that is Lebanon would serve as a model for humankind, differences should be what brings us together.

For more information on the history and heritage of the Lebanese Jewish community, please visit this page http://www.thejewsoflebanon.org/

For avoidance of any doubt, I just wish to clarify that I am involved in this beautiful project out of love and respect for our country, and our Jewish compatriots, the least we can do to preserve our country’s true spirit and identity. By compatriots I mean the Lebanese Jews who were forced into Diaspora. These are our brothers and sisters, and our society owes them an apology (God knows our society owes an apology to all of us). The minute they wish to return home, they will certainly NOT be coming back as tourists. The second objective is, I need to break the taboo inside me, and to finally put into action what I have been brought up to believe, our fight is not with the Jews, it is with the Zionists. Thirdly, to excercise my refounded conviction that peace is the best way to win a war.

How did it start, hmmm...? Yes, I snuck into the Jewish Cemetery in Sidon. It got a bit more complicated. I wrote an article and posted it and then I got a comment that Isaac recognized the grave of his father...

I intentionally want to repost the story in sequence on my blog; the intention is to shed more light on the fight for the plurality of Lebanon. We Lebanese do not forget our brothers and sisters, we might from time to time suffer a relapse, but what ties us together is blood and heritage, blood in our veins, not spilled blood on the streets.

Our country has been harsh on us, it has pushed us away, every morning it puts us to trial, but it is love that keeps us going, who can NOT love this place?

Who needs a President?

Call me a fool (not in my face), but I have this strange "free" feeling ever since the Presidential Post moved under the "Help Wanted" section. When Emile Lahoud left the Presidential Palace last Friday, I felt relieved that I lived to see him depart, and proud that regardless of all the traumas and scandals we Lebanese manage to bring on ourselves, and all the dependency and immaturity our political class never fails to display, that while we cannot as a people run our own affairs without hailing the whole world paratroopers and maniacs in, I was proud that we manage to get rid of those in authority eventually, peacefully, but not quietly. What is a 9-year term when it comes to a lifetime president, or to hereditary rule? I even felt a tiny shred of respect for the ex-President. He overstayed his welcome, but at least he walked out, and unlike other Arab rulers, was not hoarded out by an ambulance, a mob, or a funeral procession. I do not want to act as a judge, so I will not comment if Lahoud has blood on his hands, in his veins, or elsewhere. Eventually, long as it may be, Justice shall prevail to either indict the criminals or to acquit the innocent.

Maybe it is that I am the only person in the country thinking -- drum roll -- do we really need a president? It's time to spurt out the suppressed feelings on authority, and a religiously branded officials in specific. Let me go through some arguments on the media on why we need a Maronite President - hopefully I'll run the same comparison one day when the House Speaker retires and no replacement is found:

1- Symbol of the country: Yeah sure, we have been the butt of half the world political jokes lately, and this is only the beginning. Sudan (home of Darfur, Halayeb, and Southern Sudan crisis) sent a peace envoy. Get it?

2- Preserving the Post for Christians: Huh? Demographically speaking, the Christians should press on a secular state – the sooner the better, and drop the religious confessional thing forever, and that goes to the rest of the Lebanese if they knew what's good for them. The Christians do not need a post to keep them or to preserve them, and if they JUST cannot live without that representation, they should realistically seek the Prime Minister's Post or the Parliament Speaker post. In reverse, the Druze go unrepresented in the top three posts, but Weam Wahab is the shining star and spokesperson of the opposition, comprising Maronites, Shiias, and Druze. MP Jumblat is one of the most influential figures in the Majority Party.

3- Protect the Christians: Let's quickly run through who invited the Syrians to protect the "Christians?" – Answer: a president. Who appealed for them to stay – Answer: another "two presidents" – Who ran civil conflict in the so called "East Beirut" – Answer: A presidential candidate assigned by another President at the end of his term. The result: half the Christians immigrated. So much for protection, representation, and preserving the symbol of the Republic.

The so called "Christian politics" have done more harm to the christian presence in the last 50 years than 2000 years of Christian presence in this land.Again and again we fall for the political lies, for the sectarian "bo3bo3" (monster), again and again we stand for our Feudal Masters in power - they manipulate us.

Having said that, enough with the religious labeling rubbish, it's time we think of ourselves as citizens, not tribesmen, or else – there won't be anyone of us left to tell where we went wrong – Christian, Muslim, or Monkey worshippers for all I care.

جزيرة الحلوم

هي المرة الرابعة التي أملئ فيها طلب الهجرة، وأحزم أمري، ثم أرمي بالأوراق في سلة المهملات. هي المرة الرابعة بعد المئة التي أسأل فيها نفسي إن كان البقاء خيار أم فرض، وإن كان في البقاء صموداً أم أن في الهروب صمود، والسؤال يبقى، إلى أين؟

لقد زرت البلاد كلها، ولم أجد منزلاً غير منزلي، فما الحل؟ كندا، جميلة وهادئة، باردة، خضراء ومثلجة، ولكنها بعيدة عن لبنان. أميركا، صاخبة وغنية، وفيها كل أصدقائي، ولكنها.. بعيدة عن لبنان.. أوستراليا.. جنة الشمس والمحيط والطبيعة العذراء المترامية.. ولكنها بعيدة عن لبنان.. البرازيل.. بعيدة بعيدة بعيدة.. ولكن.. أليس لبنان بعيد عن لبنان؟ أما من حجة إلا البعد؟

الرومانسية داء لا دواء له.. الرومانسية كجرح الحديد الصدئ لا تزول.. أما الغد فضباب.. أخاف الأمل خشية أن أصاب بخيبة الأمل! ما أصعب الإنتظار.. ما أصعب القرار، والأصعب منه، اللا قرار. وما الأصعب، الألم أم الندم؟

قبرص.. نعم قبرص.. جزيرة الحلوم والشطآن والحمير البيضاء.. لأن قمرها قمرنا، ولأن بحرها بحرنا، ولأن شتاءها مطرنا! إن تضيعوني تجدوني على الشاطئ في لارنكا أرنو نحو الشرق

أن تغادر الوطن لا يعني أنه سيغادرك..فربما أصنع من طلبات الهجرة مركباً من ورق ومن نسغ أحلام ذائبة، وأخاف من الغد لأنه قد يكون اليوم الآخير

A Northern Tail

I am fed up! Surrounded by an enemy for a southern neighbor, and a pest of brotherhood on our northern and eastern border, we just needed creepy guests in the Palestinian Camps to make our life perfect! Fat7 El-Islam my foot. A collection of moron sociopaths - nothing less; a collection bank looters and highway robbers, Thelma and Louise were better gangsters!!

Have they run out of enemies in the IDF so that they start killing the Lebanese Army personnel? I heard on Jazeera there spokesman (sic) claiming he wants to defend the “Ahl el Sunna” in Lebanon. More self-appointed saviors for those who do not need saving. Who’s next? The Simpsons?

Bearded Ma Bakers! Islam does not need you. Sunnis do not need you, and God knows, God does not need you. Palestine is Southward, Nahr El Barid is 150KM far off your destination. March away, and watch that you do not trip with your tails.

Divine Discourse: God

I have developed this great fascination with "Hinduism" and Buddhism. A Hindu friend of mine has pledged to send articles relating to the "Hindu" views of the divine, which is more or less the same as everyone else's view of the divine.

In Lebanon, for some reason, we grow to believe that the world ends near the Euphrates. It's quite a shame, considering that interaction between India/China/Persia and the Arab countries persisted for centuries.

I will do my best to post all the articles I get, and later on, perhaps my experience with Hinduism and Buddhism. One thing I can say with confidence, I am a Buddhist in the making, and I need to learn more.. more.. and more..

Thank you Radha for the article.

----------------

A great sage once fell in with a gang on non-believers in an atheist settlement. They crowded around him and plied him with impertinent queries and insisted that he must show them the God in whom he believed. The sage promised to do so, but, asked for some milk, before he could demonstrate God. The vessel of milk was brought; he sat silent for a long while, stirring the milk with his finger. The crowd got exasperated at the delay and at his silence. They asked him what he was
at; he replied that he was only trying to spot out where the butter was, top, middle or bottom? The crowd shouted that it was everywhere, in every drop of milk and that he could see it only when the preliminary process of churning was done. Then, the sage answered, "Well, the Lord too is immanent in every atom of this universe. He can be perceived and experienced only when the preliminary spiritual exercises of Saadhana are done. There is a definite well-known process for God-realisation also, just as there is a definite well-known process for butter realisation.

- From Bhagawan's Divine Discourse in Prashanthi Nilayam, December 1963

Running out of Passwords...

For as long as I could remember over the last decade, my pet's name, Fluffy, was my favorite password, and pastime. There is a strange ambiance pets create in our lives, whether a cat, a dog, a parrot, a hamster, or even a turtle.

Fluffy, a Chinchilla Persian white feline – with charms and manners that get the better of anybody - has been central in my family's life for the last 11 years. She passed away Friday, age 11.

It is surprising that with all the death and pain around us, one is able to shed so many tears over an animal. One cannot control his emotions though. Sadness and Happiness are not mutually exclusive.

For such a long time, our life at home revolved around Fluffy: From very early morning wake up visits to morning grooming sessions. Fluffy determined our family vacations and our travel schedules – we could not all travel together, there had always to be a cat-sitter. Fluffy had to be kept out of my suitcase every time I pack, and her long white hair was a long time trademark on my dark suits and corduroy pants.

Fluffy were the first thing that greets me when I returned home, and the last thing that chased me out of it. Fluffy was my laptop arm-rest, my wake up alarm, my hot water bottle, and my reading companion.

Most of all, Fluffy was the password I used as part of my password combinations.. I spent last weekend changing those – just to avoid the sinking heart feeling when I type in my password on my computer or phone every morning.

A friend of mine who lost his cat "Lenin" last year wrote: Shakespeare compared life to a stage on which every person acts his part effectively and then leaves. I know that cats are one of the best stage actors, because they profoundly affect your life in all aspects… Sleep well buddy for she watches you back stage.

Fluffy, lovingly called "Beeti" - now rests in peace at a beautiful spot under an old tree near a water spring. Having lived for 11 years, but kept the manners of a queen and the character of a kitten, she's not an easy thing to forget.

If cats go to heaven, Fluffy would already be as I shall always remember her, sitting in the cool shade of the large Jasmine tree like the one in our garden in regal poise.

A Flower: What is Spring-time?

It's almost spring, and nature is bursting with greenery, and with tiny little white daisies and red anemones.. Below is a list of flower meanings, courtesy of www.Lebaneseflowers.com

There is another imaginary flower than only I and a friend of mine (a.k.a Putty Putt) know the connotation of, Percatitum. It stands for fun, friendship, wild dreams, and reality-checks.

A
Acacia - Secret love
Acorn - Nordic symbol of life and immortality
Aloe - Grief
Allspice - Compassion
Ambrosia - Love returned
Amaryllis - Pride; Timidity
Anemone - Unfading love
Angelica - Inspiration
Aniseed - Restoration of youth
Arbutis - Only love
Apple - Preference
Aster - Love; daintiness
Azalea - Take care of yourself for me; fragile passion; Chinese symbol of womanhood

B
Bachelor Button - Celibacy
Baby's Breath - Everlasting Love
Basil - Best Wishes, Love
Bay Leaf - Strength
Begonia - Beware
Bells Of Ireland - Good luck
Bird Of Paradise - Magnificence
Bittersweet - Truth
Bluebell - Humility; constancy
Borage - Courage
Bouquet of withered flowers - Rejected love
Burnet - A merry heart
Buttercup - Cheerfulness

C
Cactus - Endurance; warmth
Calendula - Joy
Camellia - Admiration; perfection; good luck gift to a man
Candytuft - indifference
Carnation (in general) Bonds of affection; health and energy; fascination; woman love
Carnation (pink) - I'll never forget you
Carnation (purple) - Capriciousness; whimsical; changeable
Carnation (red) - My heart aches for you; admiration
Carnation (solid color) -Yes
Carnation (striped)- No; refusal; sorry I can't be with you; wish I could be with you
Carnation (white) -Sweet and lovely; innocence; pure love; woman's good luck gift
Carnation (yellow) - Rejection; disdain
Cattail - Peace; prosperity
Cedar – Lebanon; eternity
Chamomile - Patience ; attracts wealth
Chrysanthemum (in general) - Cheerfulness; You're a wonderful friend
Chrysanthemum (red) - I love
Chrysanthemum (white) - Truth
Chrysanthemum (yellow) -Slighted love
Coreopsis - Always cheerful
Coriander - Lust
Cowslip - Pensiveness; winning grace
Crocus - Cheerfulness; abuse not
Cyclamen - Resignation and goodbye
Clover Good luck

D
Daffodil Respect
Daisy Innocence
Dandelion Wishes come true

E
Eucalyptus - Protection

F
Fennel - Worthy of all praise
Fern - Sincerity
Forget-Me-Not - True love
Fern (Magic) - Fascination; confidence and shelter
Fern (Maidenhair) - Secret bond of love
Feverfew - Protection
Fir - Time
Flax - Domestic symbol; fate
Forget-me-not - True love; memories
Forsythia - Anticipation

G
Gardenia - You're lovely; secret love
Garland of roses - Reward of virtue
Garlic - Courage; strength
Geranium (Scented) - Preference
Gladiolus - Love at first sight
Grass - Submission; utility

H
Heather (lavender) - Admiration; solitude
Heather (white) - Protection; wishes will come true
Hibiscus - Delicate beauty
Holly - Good will, Defense;domestic Happiness; foresight
Honeysuckle - Generous and devoted affection
Hyacinth (general) - Games and sports; rashness;flower dedicated to Apollo
Hyacinth (blue) - Constancy
Hyacinth ( purple) - I'm sorry; please forgive me; sorrow
Hyacinth (red or pink) - Play
Hyacinth (white) - Loveliness; I'll pray for you
Hyacinth (yellow) - Jealousy
Hydrangea - Thank you for understanding; frigidity; heartlessness
Hyssop - Wards away evil spirits

I
Iris - Faith; hope; wisdom and valor
Ivy - Fidelity and friendship
Ivy - sprig of white tendrils - Anxious to please; affection

J
Jasmine - Amiability; attracts wealth
Jonquil - Love me; affection returned; desire; sympathy; desire for a return of affection

L
Larkspur - pink - Fickleness
Lavender - Devotion
Lemon - Zest
Lemon Balm - Brings love
Lemon verbena - Attracts opposite sex
Lily (general) - Keeps unwanted visitors away
Lily (calia) - Beauty
Lily (day) - Coquetry
Lily (eucharis) - Maiden charms
Lily (orange) - Hatred
Lily (tiger) - Wealth; pride
Lily (white) - Virginity; purity; majesty; it's heavenly to be with you
Lily (yellow) - I'm walking on air; false and gay
Lily of the valley - sweetness; return to happiness; humility

M
Magnolia - Sweetness; beauty; love of nature
Marigold - Comforts the heart
Mint - Protection from illness; warmth of feeling
Marjoram (sweet) - Joy and happiness
Mistletoe - Kiss me; affection; to surmount difficulties; sacred plant of India
Monkshood - Beware, a deadly foe is near; chivalry
Moss - Maternal love; charity
Myrtle - Love; Hebrew emblem of marriage

N
Narcissus - Egotism; formality; stay as sweet as you are
Nasturtium - Conquest; victory in battle; maternal love; charity; patriotism

O
Oleander - Caution; beware
Orange Generosity
Orange Blossom - Brings wisdom
Orange Mock - Deceit
Orchid - Love; beauty; refinement; beautiful lady; Chinese symbol for many children
Orchid (cattleya) - Mature charm

P
Palm leaves - Victory and success
Pansy - Thoughts; love
Peach Longevity
Peony - Aphrodisiac
Petunia - Resentment; anger; your presence soothes me
Pine - Hope; pity
Poppy (general) - Eternal sleep ; oblivion; imagination
Poppy (red) -Pleasure; consolation
Poppy (white) - Consolation; sleep
Poppy( yellow) - Wealth; success
Prickly Pear - Satire
Primrose - I can't live without you; early youth
Primrose(evening) - Inconstancy

R
Rose (general)(Red) - Love ; I love you
Rose( white) - Eternal Love ; innocence; heavenly; secrecy and silence
Rose(pink) - Perfect happiness; please believe me
Rose(Yellow) - Friendship ; jealousy; try to care
Rose(Black) -Death
Rose(red and white) - Together; unity
Rose(thornless) - Love at first sight
Rose( single, full bloom) - I love you; I still love you
Rose bud - Beauty and youth ; a heart innocent of love
Rose bud(red) - Pure and lovely
Rose bud(white) - Girlhood
Rosebud (moss) - Confessions of love
Roses(Bouquet of full bloom) - Gratitude
Roses( Garland or crown of) - Beware of virtue; reward of merit; crown ; symbol of superior merit
Roses ( musk cluster) - Charming
Rose(tea) - I'll always remember
Rose(cabbage) - Ambassador of love
Rose(Christmas) - Tranquilize my anxiety; anxiety
Rose(damask) - Brilliant complexion
Rose(dark crimson) - Mourning
Rose(hibiscus) - Delicate beauty
Rose leaf - You may hope
Rosemary - Remembrance

S
Sage Wisdom - long life
Salvia -(blue) I think of you
Smilax - Loveliness
Snapdragon - Deception; gracious lady; presumption
Spiderflower - Elope with me
Stephanotis - Happiness in marriage; desire to travel
Stock - Lasting beauty
Strawberry - Perfect goodness
Sunflower - Loyalty; wishes
Sweetpea - Goodbye; departure; blissful pleasure; Thank you for a lovely time

T
Thyme - Strength and courage; ensures restful sleep
Tulip(general) - Fame,charity; perfect lover
Tulip(red) - Believe me; declaration of love
Tulip(variegated) - Beautiful eyes
Tulip(yellow) - Hopeless love

V
Violet - Modesty; calms tempers; induces sleep
Violet(blue) - Watchfulness; faithfulness; I'll always be true
Violet(white) - Let's take a chance on happiness
Viscaria - Will you dance with me?

W
Woodruff - sweet humility

Y
Yarrow - Health,healing

Z
Zinnia - Thoughts of friends
Zinnia(magenta) - Lasting affection
Zinnia(mixed) - Thinking of an absent friend
Zinnia(scarlet) - Constancy
Zinnia(white) - Goodness
Zinnia(yellow) - Daily remembrance

Translation of a Poem

There is something about war and violence that makes love ever brighter. I have no explanation, following is someting I jotted down in Arabic to reply to a post by Eve, and I have grown to like it, so I translated it.. just for the heck of it! During war,, people cuddle around, hugs are longer, kisses are warmer... the fear of loss makes every moment as good as a lifetime..

 

Arabic is a language of music and poetry. No translation would ever do an Arabic poem any favour.. Arabic to Arabs is a sacred language,  it is music, theatre, sculpture, colour, and painting altogether entwined.... It is for that reason perhaps that Arabs fail to make themselves understood (one of many reasons.. I should say)... 

 

 

        The nails of your body gather my ashes

        I... the Phoenix

        And I float in a sea of rain drops.. and scent

Your napkins I carry along.. like wine cask

..like Priest's incense, like empty bread baskets

 

Of the dust of your face I build a shrine for love… I sow grain

Of the light of your eyes I make a star in heaven

Of the scent of your hair I gasp to fill my lungs

I spread them napkins to make sails   

To cruise between droplets

To loose you, too seek you, to find you..

 

Wings of fallen angels carry me away of the eternal heaven

To the land of sin and land of love

I strike my stick and water bursts

.. birds come by and I steal you a tune…

I split the sea to fetch you a bouquet of pearl

… I take-off my past to make you a gown of memories

And return to you.. my queen

 

She says "I know you"

Because I know your words

I count your breaths

And I gather the fire of your rage to dry my wet hair

 

O Lady… I carry the spear and the dagger,

I lock the doors,

Raise the barriers,

Break the stones,

And stab the ground…

 

But inside, I am the Guardian of the Rose Garden..

 

  

 

 

 

 

  

حارس حديقة الورد

 

 

مسامير جسمك تجمع رمادي

أنا الفينيق
وأطفو في بحر من قطرات المطر
والعطر

محارم الورق دنان الخمر أحملها
بخور كهنة
وسلال خبز فارغة

من غبار وجهك أبني كعبة للعشق
وأزرع الحنطة
ومن نور عينيك أصنع نجمة في السماء
واشهق لتمتلئ رئتي بعبير شعرك
فأنشر المحارم أشرعة
وأبحر بين القطرة والقطرة
لأجدك .. لأضيعك ... لأبحث عنك

تحملني أجنحة الملائكة الهاربة من جنة الخلد
إلى أرض المعاصي وأرض العشق
فأضرب بعصاي الصخر لينبجس الماء
ولتدنو العصافير فأخطف لك دندنة
وأشق البحر لأقطف لك باقة من اللؤلؤ
وأخلع الماضي فأصنع لك ثوباً من الذكريات
وأعود إليك مليكتي

 

 وتقول لي أعرفك

لأني أعرف كلماتك

وأعدد أنفاسك

وأجمع نار غضبك لأجفف شعري المبتل

 

أنا يا سيدتي أحمل الرمح والخنجر

وأوصد الأبواب

وأرفع الستار

وأفتت الأحجار

وأفلح الأرض 

 

..  والمهنة: حارس حديقة الورد

 

Beirut's Little Guardians... &Desert Ships

Last Saturday, it was dreadfully stormy in Beirut. I got out of the Gym, and felt like a Corn Arnous (roasted Corn Kernel) & perhaps Nescafe on Ein Mreiseh.

Those who know the Corniche Ein Mreiseh facing AUB would know how the waves crash on the railings and over the pavement. I thought perhaps I'd test the madness of whoever would push a cart to sell Corn and Coffee in such weather.

Well, there you go – on the way – following observations:
1- Pouring Rain, guys having their cars washed at Car-Wash Station. Makes sense! Rain on a clean car is cleaner, and, the inside has to be Vacuum cleaned &polished.
2- From afar, I saw a line of cars near the pavement of the seaside awaiting their turn to be window served under the pouring rain.
3- Not only did I get my roast corn reward, I had Foul with extra-salt and lemon and cumin, at regular prices, followed by another stop at the Coffee Cart for 500 LL.

My Conclusion:
1- Lebanese are mad people, myself-included; there's no reason to stop such lively madness though.
2- Whatever drives the Cart-Owners to leave home in such a storm and stay in the rain is a combination of service excellence and inability to survive without one day's pay. Strikes do not serve either purpose.
3- Whatever drives people to leave home, get their cars washed, and wander around the Corniche in such a storm is love of life, perhaps terrible frustration of what one hears on TV, and determination to move on. Strikes and Politicians are counter productive in that sense: Burnt tires get cars dirty, there's no where to get the car washed, or even to go out with the car. Politicians on the other hand are filth-engendered.
4- I haven't heard of an MP or a Speaker, a PM (elected, removed twice by popular revolt "Omar Karami" or militarily assigned), a minister (incumbent, resigned, or Mr. Weam Wahab), or anyone else with a Divine or Earthly conquest or vocation whatsoever, who has to work under the rain, or who has an installment to pay, or a child to put in school. I'm eager to know if the resigned ministers have returned their "pay-Cheques" since November?

Politicians are our "public servants," not our masters. I for one have no master whether hereditary, political, self-proclaimed, or divinely assigned. While I encourage and welcome the disabled brothers and sisters to run for office, Mental Disability does not qualify for a Handicap Parking – especially where politicians are concerned.

For some of us, leaving this country is easy – worse, living in a bubble in this country is even easier. It is those people who make the bread and coffee of this country that guard it. They are the people, they ARE the country – they are the Guardians.

Our tragedy is that politics is the game of the big guys, and the telltale of the middle class. It is something to practice when other basic needs are fulfilled. Them politicians and self-assigned saviors have pushed political thought and "causes" down to the lowest stratum of the society – Paris III is what a taxi driver would be defending, Divine Victory is what the Falafel-Shop owner is arguing for,… Colonialism, or the right of Iran to build nuclear arsenal, or the Hegemony of the US is what the lowest most deprived, most ill-treated, most-ignorant, most-tired stratum of society is discussing instead of their livelihood, or their future. The oppressor is always "the other side". Those people fail to see that their biggest oppressors are their own. Their Fuedal Rulers, their Beiks, their Political Party Leaders, and their clerics.:

They have busied the people with filth. They have fooled the people. In the name of God, in the name of Bread, in the name of Right, in the name of revolution, in the name of salvation, they have lied.

For the sake of clarity. I am biased! I do take sides! I am pro-government because I dislike the figures of the opposition. That's not a smart or intelligent choice, some of you would say - But then again, neither one of us on this blog have to walk or work in the rain or starve – so we can afford to argue this over coffee, someone else has to Prepare the Coffee.. and he has barely any energy left to go on.

So… I have what it seems as a fair proposition. Let us all go down to the streets, let us carry the opposition politicians and the government politicians, and hurl them all in a sinking ship. Wait!!! Add the religious clerics from the 18 recognized confessions. Except for Haifa Wehbi, you are welcome to add a selection from the entertainment industry – Mr. Wahab is my choice to go into the engine room.

I would have said the one who survives let us make him president, and then I remembered that we have at least one very good swimmer.

Make it the middle of the Desert then; perhaps the winged horses could fly some of them back. Better go without 10 innocent politicians (yeah right…) than keep the whole herd alive.

The wonderful Eve was encouraging us to write something for the blog. Now you have my answer to abstention, I was keeping quiet because what I have to say cannot be said in public.

They should all go.

Ruler's Luck

What Luck for Rulers that Men do not think! - Adolf Hilter

In praise of Lebanese Sectarianism

A bitter fact of life, a good article from Today's Daily Star.
---------
In praise of Lebanese Sectarianism

By Michael Young

Daily Star Staff

Praising Lebanon's sectarian system may seem odd this end of year, as sectarianism seems closer than ever before to devouring the society. But that's precisely what we should do, because political developments in recent weeks have shown that sectarianism, for all its demonstrable shortcomings, is the only system reflecting the true nature of social relations, imposing humility on all the parties, and offering the Lebanese a pluralism so abysmally lacking elsewhere in the Middle East.

Over the decades, eliminating sectarianism has come to be associated with the brisk air of modernism. There is some justice in the claim. A society cannot truly flourish if every aspect of life is reduced to one's religious affiliation. Promotion by sect usually means a state bureaucracy where merit is lacking. Confined to confessional boundaries, politics or public service means that the most ambitious must either tie their fate to sectarian political leaders to get somewhere, or emigrate. And the rigidities of sectarianism are such that Lebanon seems forever stranded in a never-never land of deal-making, profit-sharing and pie-slicing.

Perhaps. But sectarianism is also the one thing that has made Lebanon more or less democratic in a region stifled by despotism. Because the religious communities are more dominant than the state, power is diffused, so that no single political actor or alliance has ever been able to impose its writ on all of society. In the absence of absolute victory, the system has, of necessity, embraced perpetual compromise - or, when one of the sides, or both, has ignored the rules, collapsed into crisis. The dissatisfied have often looked for salvation in a strong state, leading to a longstanding rivalry between supporters of muscular state institutions and supporters of traditional sectarian leaders. Not surprisingly, the latter have usually won out because they better reflect the country's social disposition, which cannot long abide exclusive central authority.

If independent Lebanon were a morgue, it would be filled with aficionados of robust statehood. President Fouad Chehab was the first to use the army and intelligence services against the traditional leaders, and he got nowhere; nor did his successor, Charles Helou. Bashir Gemayel, president-elect for three weeks, had a similar antipathy for sectarianism, and hoped to use the state to tame and transcend it. He was murdered before he could do much, but his brother Amin applied a likeminded rationale, and within two years he had crashed. Emile Lahoud was elected in 1998 to break the sectarian leaders on behalf of the Syrian regime, but in 2000 he suffered a withering defeat at their hands in parliamentary elections. Now Lebanon must deal with two more dogged "statists," Sayyed Hassan Nasrallah and Michel Aoun, and both are being reminded daily that they cannot wantonly bend Lebanon to their own advantage.

A few years ago, Nasrallah, in an Ashura speech, decried the Lebanese arrangement, saying it was characterized by "leaders of alleyways, of confessional groups, of districts." Instead of this, Hizbullah's leader declared, Lebanon needed "great men and great leaders." Unfortunately, he got it exactly wrong: The bane of Lebanon is not leaders of alleyways, but great men - or more precisely mediocre men who believe themselves to be great. Michel Aoun has, similarly, juggled contradictory sentiments: a contempt for sectarianism deployed alongside claims to be a paramount sectarian representative, all wrapped up in an audacious fancy that he is a man of destiny who, as the self-anointed embodiment of national salvation, can overcome Lebanon's untidy divisions.

In both Nasrallah's and Aoun's dislike of the system is a sometimes defensible loathing for wheeling and dealing - even though the two men are not lacking in that talent. However, they regard themselves as above the political fray, better than the riffraff maneuvering down below. Both consider an enhanced state, one they control, as the way around sectarian bargaining, even though they are fundamentally sectarian in their outlook and Nasrallah's ideal state looks very different than Aoun's. There is something deeply disturbing in their attitude: an intolerance for diversity, for making concessions to earn concessions, for the disorderliness of a system they would prefer to replace with something regimented.

Aoun and Nasrallah may be on a collision course when it comes to their totalistic visions for Lebanon, but in December it was as one that they hit a brick wall in trying to bring down the government of Prime Minister Fouad Siniora. In the face of a unified and fuming Sunni backlash, both men were suddenly forced to acknowledge the red lines of sectarian conduct. The message they heard was a clear one: Either Hizbullah would have to limit its demands or Lebanon would enter a new civil war. When Nasrallah spoke two weeks ago to assembled opposition protestors, the virulence of his speech partly covered for the fact that he had seen the writing on the wall. He was sending word, probably to his Syrian allies, that fighting Sunnis was out of the question - before retreating under a compensatory hail of indictments directed against the majority.

Today, Hizbullah is in a quandary.

Siniora is here to stay and Nasrallah is absorbing the unforgiving dictates of sectarianism. Though the Hizbullah leader may have been dragged kicking and screaming into the alleyways of confessional politics, he now knows that he cannot ignore this. He is displaying modesty, in contrast to Aoun, who is beginning to sense that his plan to take over the state is slipping away. It is no coincidence that the Aounists have started a parliamentary petition condemning Siniora's alleged abuse of the Constitution. For weeks it has become double or nothing for the general's nervous followers, but by dismissing sectarian sensitivities they will almost certainly end up with nothing.

Every few years the Lebanese must cope with an individual, party or community that ignores, disastrously, sectarian conventions. When the Maronites, the Sunnis and the Druze couldn't get it right during the 1970s, the country descended into a 15-year war. Today, it is Hizbullah, as prime spokesman for the Shiite community, that is making a similar miscalculation. If conflict can be averted, then the party's learning a lesson will have been worthwhile: better a weak Lebanese state where communal alignments can counterbalance the hegemonic tendencies of one side to a strong, purportedly non-sectarian state that will consistently drift toward a disputed, therefore unstable, authoritarianism.

That said, permanent, rigid sectarianism is not ideal. For any truly democratic order to emerge, the Lebanese must ultimately think as citizens, not as members of religious tribes. But wishing that away will not work. The only solution is to modify sectarianism from within, to provisionally accept its institutions while making it more flexible and opening up space for non-sectarian practices. The Taif agreement outlines the means to reach this end, and just as soon as Lebanon can break free of Syrian and Iranian manipulation, just as soon as Hizbullah agrees to a process leading to its disarmament, no matter how lengthy, sectarian negotiations will become possible and the road to reform can be taken.

Michael Young is opinion editor of THE DAILY STAR.

Copyright (c) 2006 The Daily Star

When will Be Lebanese Campaign: Anti-Secterianism

Click on the link of this campaign sponsored by Byblos Bank.

Happy Holidays: Peace on Earth

Remember that thought? With all that's going on around the world, the wish for Peace is an old fashion term I guess!